There Was This Girl

Scan-15 There Was This Girl

She was lost. Lost inside herself. Trapped in views of others. Confined with unrighteous beliefs. She was trying to see. She was trying to be. Someone. Something. She tried to be what others wanted her to be. She thought this was who she was supposed to be. This, however, wasn’t who she wanted to be.

There was this girl, who could never be, who she wanted to be.

So she escaped, into her imagination. She escaped into her mind. Constricted herself into her soul. She did this for protection. She did this to be safe. She locked her innocents inside. Her imagination was the only place in which others could relate. A world. A place that was safe.

There was this girl, who could only be what she thought others wanted to see.

It was on the outside that she failed to be, that she failed to hope, that she failed to see, who she was and who she wanted to be. She was clever. She was smart. And in her imagination she was free. It was in her imagination she could be, whatever she wanted to be. Outside of her imagination she only showed others what they wanted to see.

There was this girl, who wasn’t this girl anymore.

She struggled to share. She struggled to relate. She struggled to regulate. Emotions stormed together. Thoughts. Stories. Words. The brilliance of life. It all echoed in her head. The key, the light to who she was stay buried within her soul. The light is buried in a place the girl doesn’t even know. A light that now may never show. A light that now she may never know. A light that once tried to glow.

There was this girl, who tried to show what it was she wanted others to know.

Only a few times she tried to let others know. Only a few times she tried to do so. She felt a love. She felt a trust. She felt that she was good enough. There were only a few times that she wanted others to see, everything she was meant to be. She wanted others to see who she wanted to be.  She tried hard for them to see. She tried so hard to be. The person that she wanted to be. She showed them who she was, and how she craved comfort and love. However, she was scared that who she was would never be good enough. All she wanted others to see was everything she was meant to be.

There was this girl who lost sight of who she was. There was this girl who grew up believing she wasn’t good enough.

And now, she doesn’t see everything that she is meant to be.





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