Blog

Dear Girl,

You were happy once. Full of life, full of love. You were happy once. I remember the day you were born, the joy that you brought to your parents, the joy that filled inside your brother. Your hazel eyes sparkled. You had two feet and ten toes, two hands, and ten fingers. As you cried out you knew you were loved, loved by me, loved by everyone. You knew with all your innocence that you were here on Earth, you made the journey to the very place you were supposed to be.

As I held you for the first time, as I held all my grandchildren for the first time, loved formed, a love that was there before you were born. A love that was there before you entered the universe before you entered Earth. A love that was always meant and always continued to be there. There was love and then I felt a different connection. A connection that was hard to explain, a connection meant to be more, a knowledge that our lives were meant to be more. Holding you helped me to see the world that was centered around me. From the moment I looked into your eyes, I knew you were different. A unique, a good, a beautiful kind of different.

When you got older, there was your laugh, that little giggle, the one that brought joy to anyone who saw you, to anyone who entered the same room. You turned heads, brought light, and gave out love and you received loved. Often as your parents would take you out, on a walk around the block, a journey to the waterfront, a program at the local library, and to church, people would stop and stare. Your presence to them was mesmerizing.

Slowly you began to explore the world around you. You started to walk. But for some reason, struggled to talk. A team of doctors followed you and eventually diagnosed you. This team put you on a path within the medical world of treatment and words of stigma. This team however adored you. They connected with your energy and they felt your love. They did their best despite the every lasting effect. Your speech. Your voice. Your love. Somehow it all vanished. Somehow it all became one, that was then undone.

Growing up, you were lost between both worlds, struggling to breathe, to see, to believe. You needed time to connect and disconnect. Other’s struggled to see. You constantly called out to me. My walls guarded, I let you down. Failed you in so many ways. More than one. You must know dear girl, that I did love you and that I did cherish you. My love remained unseen, other’s love remained unseen.

You needed time, time to take the world in, time to think and sort through the overpowering thoughts within your head. You needed time. Except life moved on all around you and there wasn’t time. You were caught up in a storm that turned ugly.  A storm that brought darkness, the black covering the gray. As this storm grew there was more dark. A soul that failed to spark. It covered what was left inside, and your imagination grew wide. You lived inside a world, one of  fairy tales and make-believe. Hoping. Holding. Hiding. The world my dear girl was your safest place. Sometimes as you withdrew I would look at your hazel eyes, wondering if it was even you. You lost your light, you lost your love. While I lost sight of who I was. I thought that if I could be something everyone wanted me to be, a mother that was strong, a grandmother that was bright. A fighter. A believer. A payer. A teacher. I went along believing, thinking I was true, thinking that I knew. My heart was kind, my eyes were wise, my head held knowledge but I remained broken inside. I know what it’s like to struggle to be you, to struggle to be real and true.

I want you to know now that you are here because of you. You are here in this world because you are you.  You are here to be true. True to you. It might be hard to see this at times, to realize the truth when you’ve lived in a world of untruth. But eventually, as life moves on you will see how everything was meant to be. Things will get better my girl, I promise you. Keep going. Keep pushing. Keeping fighting. Fight for who you are and who you want to be. Things may get scary, and life may get rough. Keep going my girl, despite now not being able to see, that one day, all your hopes and dreams, life plans and goals, will be true, will become true, as long as you stay true to you.

Love always,

Granny.

Becoming Heard

Scan-34 Becoming Heard

Something comes from nothing. Nothing comes from something. Overpowered. Over spoken. Unvalued. Unheard. Words form. Sentences are made. We try and be outspoken, but we are left, unheard, overlooked, and provoked. Speak up. Be noticed. Gain attention. Use a voice. We are still left unheard. Inside we are screaming. Outside, we barely blink. Who understands? Who hears? We cry. We beg. We plead. We are unnoticed. A voice that is unimportant. Not good enough. Never good enough. Unheard. We are unheard.

Who will answer us? Who will come to us? Who will wrap their arms around us? Listen. Listen. We are here. We are there. We are everywhere. Screaming. Loudly. Silently. Screaming. Over and over again. Just like the first time. Just like the last time. Just like the next time. We are unheard.

Children. We are children. We want to be heard, want to be noticed, and want to be loved. Somehow, somewhere along the way, we became unheard. Now we are lost inside, trapped amongst feelings, emotions, and thoughts. We are lost. Unnoticed. Unheard. What happened to you? What happened my child, to make you unheard? A traumatic event, an overflowing storm? A trust that has vanished along the way? What happened to you? What happened my child, to make you unheard?

Inside we feel unheard. Inside we break. Inside we plead. Inside we hope. We grasp hold of our surroundings. Anything to make us believe, anything to make us see. We are here We are everywhere. My child, please listen, we are here. Hurt. Pain. Heartbreak. Broken promises. Broken hope. We walk with beating hearts. We walk with bleeding hearts. We cope with unhealthy mechanisms, anything to take the pain away. We turn to anyone, those to make us feel wanted, those who make us feel valued, those who make us feel loved and those, who make us feel unheard.

How is it then that we become heard? Lost in the motion and movement of today, of every day. People. Places. Things. Everything circles around us. Life moves fast. Events happen. A journey is created. Our voices remain lost amongst the motion and the movement, amongst us, lost within our soul. Speak up, my child. Let’s hear your voice. Let’s feel your thoughts, and sneak the emotions to see life within your soul. You are here. You are everywhere. Speak up my child, it’s time to become heard.

Heard. A voice, that echoes from within. A voice that surfaces. A voice that becomes valued. A voice that’s believed. A voice that’s dominated. Heard. We are and will be heard. Heard within us. Heard within our soul. We are and will be heard.  Close your eyes. Speak your truth. Sneek your truth That’s your voice. Your power. Everything stands within, life forms from within. We see, we live, we love, the physical world around us, but it’s in the non-physical that life forms, that we form and we become heard. We have always and will always be cherished, loved, wanted. We hold value, faith, and hope. Our guides guide us, listen to us, respect us. We become heard and are never unheard.

We transform. We grow. We develop. We turn inside out. We bloom like flowers. We leave our cocoons like butterflies. We fly free. We fly high. We build our intuition. We develop trust and grow within ourselves. We let go, try not to look back. We run. Fast and far away. We run from ourselves and from those around us. Please, my child, don’t be afraid, as feelings and emotions form, love will develop. Please, my child, decide to stay.

The search may seem endless. Our voices may seem distant. A truth unbelievable. A life that’s become forgotten. Searching brings up nothing. We bury ourselves, blockade ourselves. We lose ourselves. We pretend in something that is more than. Within our souls, as we journey towards a path of discovery, we become heard. Our lives, our childhoods, and our dreams, inside ourselves we become heard. We build our intuition, connect to our higher selves, retrieve messages for our spirit guides and teachers. This is how we how we stay heard. On the outside. On the inside. This is how we stay heard.

How to Survive a Spiritual Awakening

First off, before going into the steps of how to survive a spiritual awakening, we should take a step back to understand what a spiritual awakening is. If you are reading this, it probably means you are going through some time of spiritual transformation, questioning who you are, where we fit inside the world, why we are here, how the universe is created and what lies beyond us. Before we go any further, I want you to know that you are not alone. There are so many people around us going through a transformational change and building an understanding of the universe and the creation of life in a spiritual way. Trying to navigate the unknown can be fearful, questionable and at times obscured. Just know, however, that you do not have to be alone doing so. We are all on our own paths and create our own time frames in regards to how we go about the awakening process. It can be new and frightening but with these tips and suggestions, I hope that these help you navigate your spiritual awakening in some way, as they helped me.

Trust Yourself. The more I began to venture into the unknown, I was afraid. I did not know what was happening or where the path I was heading down would take me. I questioned the process, scared to take steps forward, despite knowing that there was an answer on the other side. Once I began to uncover these answers, I began to build trust in myself more. One of the most important things I learned on this journey so far is that you know yourself better than anyone else. The key, however, to stop being afraid, the key to moving forward and getting the answers you so desperately desire is to trust yourself and not be afraid of where you lead yourself.

Build Connections With Your Spirit Guides. Spirit Guides are teachers, souls that come from Spirit to help guide you and teach you. They are often there helping you on your path of spiritual awakening. They can send you signs, or lead you in the right direction. They help answer your questions to the unknown to create a world that is known. To build a connection with your spirit guides, trusting yourself is the first step to connect with yourself to receive guidance. Spirit guides are never there to hurt you. By building trust in yourself to then develop a connection with your guides, they will help lead you on the path and direct you to where you need to go. They will never take you in the wrong direction.

Connect with Other Like Minded People. It is easy to feel alone when going through an awakening process. Ideas of who you thought you were and who you want to be as a person can constantly change, over and over again. We gain new thoughts and new ideas of who we want to be and how we can build our lives from where they are now. It’s easy to want to share these ideas with friends and family, who may have opinions and who may not feel the same way. What helped me on this journey was to connect with others who had similar ideas and beliefs as me. I joined different meetup groups and began to build relationships among these groups. This helped me find a way where I could explore my beliefs, values, and ideas without feeling that I was being judged. It also helped me understand and answer more questions about my spiritual awakening.

Find a Positive Way to Release Your Emotions. Emotions throughout a spiritual awakening can build up fast, especially if you are an empath. Find positive ways to release your emotions, rather than letting them build up inside. By isolating ourselves and our emotions while going through a spiritual awakening, we are blocking ourselves off from seeing the truth. We can lash out at others and sometimes even our own selves. Finding a way to release our emotions in a positive way can help us understand what we are feeling inside. I started to go see a counsellor who was familiar with helping individuals go through their own spiritual awakenings. By going to see her, I was able to talk about my thoughts, feelings, and emotions to build trust in myself and in journey, I am on.

Ground Yourself. Sometimes, as we awaken further, we can develop abilities and our intuition builds. Things can get to be overwhelming. Imagine finding out that you have the ability to communicate with spirit, animals, feel other’s emotions and predict the future. These are some of my abilities. It was hard to understand what was going on at first. I was stuck between the physical and the non-physical world often being at such a high vibration I was not able to ground. Learning grounding skills and building techniques to help you stay centered. By learning these skills they can help you manage and go through everything that is happening around you. Meditation can be helpful. Listening to calming music. Lighting candles. Using rocks or crystals. Our grounding skills are all different. Use whatever works for you to help you stay present.

As you begin or continue to go on your spiritual journey, try and build positive energy inside of you. This will help attract other positive energy, diminish the darkness and give you motivation as you continue to discover the unknown. Trust yourself on this journey and know that your spirit guides are always with you to teach you, protect you, and guide you.

 

5 Common Struggles That Every Empathic Person Faces

As empaths, every day can sometimes be a struggle. Others emotions and energy often get attracted to us, good or bad. This can be tough, especially if you are in a busy work environment, a crowded area, event, or function. Our emotions tend to heighten as a result and sometimes we are left to feel all the emotions around us. This can become at times, overwhelming. We connect to others in a way that attaches them to us, draws them in and somehow we compel them. This can happen at any time and anywhere. Sometimes, we are just walking down the street,  we could be at the grocery store, a fitness class, or a social event. Then when the conversation is done, the event is completed and the day is over, we can be left feeling exhausted, introverting into our save place while cutting everything and everyone out around us.

I wanted to create this post to raise awareness that while sometimes there are advantages to being an empath, there are also disadvantages, common struggles that we all tend to go through. As I share my own top 5 struggles, I hope that some of you reading this can relate to some or all of the points. Please feel free to leave a comment and join in on the discussion to share what your struggles are as an empath. Together, I hope that we can build each other up and not bring each other down.

We Feel Too Many Emotions From Others

Often at times, emotions from others can get tangled up within our own. This can be hard a times to explain to those who are not empath. As empaths others emotions get attached to us and we are left to feel, overly feel.  It can feel as if the volume from the TV is turned up to full blast. That’s how an empath can feel. Everything is heightened. Emotions are often unmanageable. We may respond to things or feel things differently in the state of feeling someone else’s emotion than we would our own. You can feel the emotion through every part of your body, almost in the exact same way the other person is feeling this in their own body. This feeling can overpower you, and impact your ability to cope.

We Can Have A Hard Time Coping With Emotions

As empaths, when we feel all of these unwanted emotions, emotions that are not our own, we can eventually explode. We explode because sometimes we think these emotions are our own. It can be challenging distinguishing between someone else’s emotion and your own. Due to the fact that our sensitivity to feel emotions is so high, we struggle to cope. Sometimes our emotions are so heightened we can’t cope or we don’t know how to cope. It’s as if we are lost between two worlds, our own world and a world of someone else. We know our world, what works to calm ourselves down when we are upset, we know what to do what we have had too much, we know what works. In this other world, it is unknown. We don’t know this person’s coping strategies. We don’t know what works or what doesn’t work. What may work for us to calm ourselves down may not work for someone else’s feelings. There are times we struggle with these feelings inside. We can turn to unhealthy coping strategies as a result. Anything to try and shut the emotions down and block ourselves out. Drinking. Drugs. Spending Money. Sex. Food. Unhealthy relationships. Unusual behaviors. We try anything. Eventually, these unhealthy habits become challenging and even more exhausting. In turn, we struggle to connect with ourselves and connect with others. We struggle because we can’t cope, and this struggle then creates another struggle, and eventually another struggle. Eventually, we come to a place where we are overly sensitive not only to ourselves but to everyone around us.

We Can Be Overly Sensitive To Conflict

 When there is conflict, we can feel it from across the room. Sometimes the feeling, the sense of conflict can be so overpowering we avoid it. We keep to ourselves. Lock all the emotions inside, until then bam, they explode. Everything explodes. Emotions then get extremely high and of course, we feel these emotions when they are extremely high. They vibrate within our skin. They sink within our stomachs. They burry within our souls. The feeling becomes intensive. Utterly intensive. We then in turn try and get rid of the feeling, try and solve the conflict. By doing this, however, the emotions get bounced right back into us and while the conflict may eventually get solved, it is usually us who apologize. We take the fault and take the blame because we don’t want the other person or people involved to feel like they are nothing at all.

We Don’t Want to Hurt Other’s Feelings

When we feel so much at times, we can feel others hurt and others heartbreak. We have a high understanding and often feeling what is right from wrong, wrong from right and often feel the truth in others. Despite the fact that we may know we are right in the argument, we can to give in because we don’t want to those around us to get hurt. When we see or feel that others are hurt, our own heart hurts, just as much and maybe possibly more. We try and make things right, fix what may not be able to be fixed. We give constantly to others around us and expect very little in return. We live for praise and application. We live for acknowledgement and the truth. But while we hold these things value to us, we are able to understand that other’s can’t at time see the truth. We try hard to not put other’s down. We try not to create hurt, because at the end of the day, because as empath’s we hurt. We always hurt.

We Can Get Exhausted Being Around People

At the end of the day, we can get exhausted. As empaths, we are often catering to everyone else’s needs but our own and feeling their emotions and our own. We are constantly trying to do the right thing, but out the fight, fix what was broken and make it become right. We try. We are always trying. Even though we are empaths, we are human too, and just like everyone else. We have our own wants and our own needs. Sometimes it is hard for us to put those needs and wants first, to look after ourselves first. The more emotions and the more from others that we do bring in, we eventually see how important it is to look after yourself. It’s easy to become exhausted, and as a result, it’s easy at the end of the day to shut ourselves off from the world, lock ourselves away to give us time to recharge. Taking that time to recharge is much needed. If you are always constantly going and if you are always constantly feeling, while constantly giving, there then gets to be nothing left for ourselves. It’s important to take time throughout the day to make sure you are aware and feeling your own emotions and meeting your wants and needs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What Happens After Death?

Ssv5r7zNI6U_U29q1efkzsI_AAAAAAAANEk_Tu168_W_ctI_s1600_energy_body___frequency_disease What Happens After Death?

Losing a loved one is hard. Often at times, we wonder, “why?”.  Life moves constantly. It is always moving forward. If we stop, it doesn’t stop. Life moves constantly. Even after death, life moves constantly. A soul always lives on. We always live on. We are brought into this world as one, one body, one mind, one soul, a physical being. We leave into the world as one. Sole. We go off into the universe, into the world between life and death, between heaven and earth. We go into a world, where we become one again, and then eventually leaving as one again.

It’s hard to understand the dying process, and even the concept of an afterlife while in the midst of grief. Grief can at times, take control of our bodies, and we become lost, searching for answers, searching for questions and looking for hope. We become absorbed into our emotions, sometimes not be able to break free again.

The Kübler-Ross model discusses the 5 stages of grief, ones we all go through after we lose someone that was important in our lives. Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance. The Kubler-Ross model makes the grieving process seem simple, put together in a linear form, that sometimes becomes nonlinear. The grieving process, however, is different for every individual who experiences it. Sure we may experience some or even all of the stages in the Kubler-Ross model, however, the grieving process looks more like a scribbled picture and a spiraling tornado. Most often as we go through a grieving process we are left with fear, fear of the unknown, and the question of what happens when we die and where did our loved one go?

A society, we have created fear as a stereotype to death. Fear of dying. Fear of the unknown. Fear of what is yet to come.  What happens when we die? Where do we go? What do we become? Some burry bodies in the ground. Other’s get criminated. Tombstones may be put up. Flowers dropped at a grave site, ashes may get spread. Cultures, religions, communities all have different views on the dying process and on the afterlife. As individuals, we also have different views on dying, death, life in general. And sometimes, that fear our society has created, makes it impossible for us to move on. We hold on to our beliefs. Heaven. Hell. Hope. Faith. We fill our minds with promises, we ensure ourselves, that our loved one is okay. And they are. They are always okay.

Throughout the dying process, our soul prepares to leave our body. It travels. Journeys in between us, journeys in between life, always coming back to our body, that is until we take the very last breath. Soul then becomes one, sole, and it absorbs the energy around us and around itself. The sole, it carries on. It may have left the human body, but it carries on. The sole always carries on. Despite the fact that the human form of the one you loved is gone, their sole always lives on. We always live on.

Our soul leaves our bodies when it is our time to move on to the next stage, the next process, the next journey in life. Our soul leaves because it’s time. Our life purpose, whatever that is supposed to be was reached. It is us that decides when it’s time to go, a decision that was made even before coming into this life. We all grieve in different ways. We are all unique. We are brought together as one and leave together as one. Grief. Death. Life after death. It may be impossible to understand at the moment, at the time someone you loved has passed away. Or it may be that your faith is strong and you feel that you have a belief, a hope, a sense that they are in Heaven and they are okay. They are always okay. Sometimes, during a grieving process, we may question this too.

As I began to connect with loved ones, soles that have become one, soles that are sent by spirit, messages that are meant to be received and passed forward, I have come to understand one very important thing. Our loved ones are always there. They are always with us. They flow within spirit, within the energy around us. They guide us. They protect us. As life constantly moves on and moves around us, they are there. They are always there. The next time you question why, the next time your emotions fade and anger has been erased, breathe in the energy and light around you. Feel their love. Feel their warmth. Your loved ones are there. They have always been here.